Psalm 73: Why Do Good People Have It So Bad?

15 01 2012

An edited journal excerpt from May 1991

“Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever

(Psalm 73:25-26).”

I find a lot of heart echoes in this psalm as I read it. It captures a lot of what has been happening in me.

Verse 2-12 describes a deep jealousy that Asaph was experiencing over the apparent prosperity of the without-God people around him. It looks to him like many of them have it easier and are doing better than the with-God people.

In verse 13-16, Asaph expresses his frustration, feeling like he has been wasting his time being faithful to God in his way of life. Trying to living in harmony with God’s will has left him where his life feels plagued. He feels punished for doing right. Why stay in relationship with God if this is the outcome? Thankfully, he realizes that he would betray his with-God community if he took action on these frustrated feelings. (vs. 15).

Asaph was overwhelmed by the hardness of his with-God life in the face of the apparent trouble-free ease of those who sniffed their nose at God. How will he gain some perspective? Where will he find wisdom? How will he make his way through such a place? When life doesn’t seem fair, when God’s good people suffer and wicked people seem to succeed, the only place to find perspective is in the presence of God (17). In God’s presence, I see with eternal eyes. I see those living in disregard of God in His presence as well, but not standing in His favor.

Like Asaph, I will feel grieved at heart and embittered in spirit (21) in the face of such temporary unfairness. I may respond to such hardship like a brute beast, ignorant and senseless (22).

I’m invited to remember the presence of God. I’m show that I am always with God and God is always with me. I am faithfully held on to in God’s gracious favor (23) and guided by perfect and wise direction (24a). My end, unlike the desperate end of the without-God one, is in the presence of God’s glory (24b).

Rather than letting my grief embitter me as I seek to remain in God in the hard places, I can recognize the lasting reality that only God can truly, deeply satisfy me to the depths of my being (25). The ways the world around me tries to satisfy the soul aren’t enough for me. This is a reality I must face and a choice I must make. My heart and my body may be weak, but God is my strength in all of this (26a). He is my portion—all that I need (26b). What is truly best for me is the simple nearness of God. (28). God is my refuge.

When I find myself in dry places, I often feel tempted to envy the what I see as a life of ease for others around me. God, help me remember that the dryness is helping me remember that nothing in creation is big enough to satisfy my soul. Being near You is my only source of true satisfaction. 

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Psalm 25: Learning God’s Ways

14 09 2011

Psalm 25:4-5 NIV
4 Show me your ways, Lord,
teach me your paths.
5 Guide me in your truth and teach me,
for you are God my Savior,
and my hope is in you all day long.

David’s prayer here made me think deeply. Like him, I want to walk in God’s ways, so I ask Him to show them to me. I don’t assume that I already know them. I don’t assume I can find them on my own. I ask Him to teach me and train me. I need a Guide. I look to Him as the best possible Savior. I look to Him hopefully, knowing that He is very good at what He does (to understate it just a bit!). Show me. Teach me. Guide me. Amen.





Psalm 105: Remembering God’s Wonders

27 08 2011

Psalm 105:5
Remember the marvels He has done;
His wonders and the judgements of His mouth. 

God invites me to remember. I must take this invitation to heart because I so easily forget them. And my forgetfulness gets me into trouble. I forget remarkable things I have witnessed, even in the last few weeks or months. I have seen You meet with those who have languished and wrestled for months with hard things. I’ve watched You solve in a moment what people have wrestled with for month, years or longer.

I have witnessed You heal families that were humanly irreconcilable. I have seen You change hearts that were beyond human hope. No one else could have done that. I have seen You bring refreshment to souls that were utterly exhausted, hope to those who were even beyond despair, new focus to those who were frantic and distracted, peace to those struggling with  anxiety, companionship to those who felt deeply lonely.

You really are a God of marvels and wonders, not just in ancient days, but today. Thank You. Enable me to richly remember Your wonders today. Please widen my perspective beyond difficult present moments.





Psalm 105: Seeking God’s Strength

26 08 2011

Psalm 105:4
Search for the Lord and His strength;
continually seek His face. 

Search and seek. These are verbs implying that finding the Lord’s strength and seeing His face require a certain effort and intentionality. Persistent attention is needed to abide more deeply and continually in His strength. A real focus of intention is needed to gaze upon His face. I find, though, that I can easily be distracted. This is the opposite of “search…and continually seek.”

Father, May Your Spirit enable me to seek You with more persistence and faithfulness. Apart from You, this is impossible for me. My practical and present experience proves this. But You can enable me to act according to the true, Spirit-inspired desires of my heart. These are the mature, adult desires that I must live out of as I “put away childish things” that do not reflect the good reign of God in my life.





Psalm 69: Praying Our Grief (Pt. 2)

23 08 2011

Part one

(An edited journal excerpt from April 1991)

16Answer me, O LORD, out of the goodness of your love; in your great mercy turn to me. 17Do not hide your face from your servant; answer me quickly, for I am in trouble. 18Come near and rescue me; redeem me because of my foes. 19You know how I am scorned, disgraced and shamed; all my enemies are before you. Because You are perfect in love and full of mercy, answer me and turn again towards me. Do not hide Yourself from my heart. Please make haste to answer me in my deep distress. I am Your servant. Notice my enemy’s attacks and keep me from His fierce and cruel assault.

20Scorn has broken my heart and has left me helpless; I looked for sympathy, but there was none, for comforters, but I found none. 21They put gall in my food and gave me vinegar for my thirst. 22May the table set before them become a snare; may it become retribution and a trap. 23May their eyes be darkened so they cannot see, and their backs be bent forever. 24Pour out your wrath on them; let your fierce anger overtake them. 25May their place be deserted; let there be no one to dwell in their tents. I can see foreshadowing of the sufferings of Christ in these verses. As I have a small share in them, I ask that You would be merciless towards my enemy and his forces. Break his teeth. Cause him to become trapped in his own traps. Pour Your wrath out on him in overwhelming ways!

26For they persecute those you wound and talk about the pain of those you hurt. The enemy persecutes and attacks those You have chosen to wound and to discipline. Be merciless to the merciless, as You have said You would.

29I am in pain and distress; may your salvation, O God, protect me. I am. Protect me by rescuing me.

30I will praise God’s name in song and glorify him with thanksgiving. 31This will please the LORD more than an ox, more than a bull with its horns and hoofs. 32The poor will see and be glad–you who seek God, may your hearts live! Right now, in imitation of the example of the psalmist, I am going to praise God’s name through singing and I will glorify Him through thanksgiving.

33The LORD hears the needy and does not despise his captive people. You hear me, Lord, when I am needy and trapped. You do not think little of me, Father. Thank You.





Psalm 105: God Chooses the Underdog

22 08 2011

Psalm 105:12-15
When they were but few in number,
few indeed, and strangers in it,
They wandered from nation to nation,
from one kingdom to another.
He allowed no one to oppressed them;
for their sake He rebuked kings.
“Do not touch my anointed ones,
Do my prophets no harm.”

In a movement of reverse pride, I am often tempted to think that I am a nobody who should not expect much, if any, attention from God. But this psalm says that You chose Israel when they were insignificant. They were unknown. They were unimportant in the eyes of the world around them. You do not choose on the basis of popularity or fame. You choose for Your own reasons. You are not swayed by the continually changing opinions of this world. One day they love you. The next they may well hate you. Who wants to live on that rollercoaster? Perhaps there are some who do, but I do not. Thank You for Your gracious choices.





Psalm 69: Praying Our Grief (Pt. 1)

21 08 2011

(An edited journal excerpt from April 1991)

Most of us are in too big a hurry to take time to grieve the losses, the hurts, or the wounds we receive along our spiritual journey. Thinking on some of my own losses, I find Psalm 69 helping to tell my story more profoundly than I could. What might praying Psalm 69 look like for me in these places?

3I am worn out calling for help; my throat is parched. My eyes fail, looking for my God. Lord, haven’t I called for help many times, but no answer has come from You? I look high and low, but see no sign of Your coming.

5You know my folly, O God; my guilt is not hidden from you. I know I don’t deserve anything, Lord. You know better than me the depths of my guilt and sin. You know that I couldn’t stand under Your scrutinizing eye. You could expose me in ways that would utterly destroy me. So I am not asking for justice, Lord. I am asking for mercy.

9for zeal for your house consumes me, and the insults of those who insult you fall on me. I feel a deep passion to see Your people worship You rightly and completely, Lord. This longing causes me great suffering when I see Your people so ignorant and careless of Your heart and Your ways. My own ignorance grieves me even more.

13But I pray to you, O LORD, in the time of your favor; in your great love, O God, answer me with your sure salvation. 14Rescue me from the mire, do not let me sink; deliver me from those who hate me, from the deep waters. 15Do not let the floodwaters engulf me or the depths swallow me up or the pit close its mouth over me. May You not delay to show favor, O Lord. Because Your love for me will not fail, please answer my request for certain rescue. I am lost without You. Don’t let me sink any more deeply into sin or separation. Liberate me from my arch enemy. Do not allow me to be overwhelmed by him in anyway!





Psalm 89: Treasuring God

5 08 2011

Psalm 89:15-17 NIV
Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim you,

who walk in the light of your presence, Lord.
They rejoice in your name all day long;

they celebrate your righteousness.
For you are their glory and strength,

and by your favor you exalt our horn.

There is blessing in learning to acclaim (praise, treasure, brag on) the Lord our God. Remembering that He is the One worth prizing and talking up is empowering and encouraging (in the sense of putting courage in me).

Verse 17 reminded me that I am not powerless or helpless today. God Himself is my glory and strength. He doesn’t give me strength that I can carry off on my own to do something with. He is with me to strengthen me along the way as I “walk in the light of His presence.”

All day today, I can know deep joy in You, Lord. I am not helpless when it comes to joy. I don’t have to wait for my circumstances to be joyful. Of course getting the news a while back that InterVarsity Press wants to publish Unhurried Time was very joyful, but I do not have to wait for circumstances to provoke joy. I have joy in Him.

You heard my prayer this morning, Father, as I offered it to You together with Gem. Hear my heart. Enable me to walk with You in courage. Empower me to take good steps that will be fruitful in both kingdom and financial terms. May I find energy and resolve to do the good work before me today. May I be free from being overwhelmed by any fear, anxiety, low confidence or self-doubt. Amen.





When You Don’t Feel Like Meeting With God

30 07 2011

A vista view from Serra Retreat in Malibu, CA

Sometimes, when I rise in the morning, I feel a resistence in me to meeting with God. I feel the temptation to let that resistance decide my morning for me. “I don’t feel like meeting with God.” That sure sounds a lot different than the psalmists who long for God and cry out for Him. I find myself saying, “I want to long for God, but I don’t feel that right now.” Is longing in this case only a feeling? Might it also be a willing, if not felt, offering of the heart?

So, I realize that my “don’t feel like it” isn’t as deep as my deeper heart’s longing for God. I really do want to meet with God in the morning. This dynamic, I think, is the spirit of what Paul teaches in his letters. For example:

Galatians 5:16-18 NIV, “So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.17 For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want.18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law.

Paul describes competing desires within us. There are flesh desires and Spirit desires. They are in conflict with each other. I am, in Paul’s description, at odds within myself. I must choose to “walk by the Spirit” (keeping with His desires) to avoid gratifying the opposing desires of the flesh.

As a result of a counseling process I’ve been in for a while, I have identified these flesh desires as having taken shape in my earlier life. My fleshly desires are those ways in which my God-given, Spirit-inspired desires have been bent and misdirected in this world. Holy desires got attached to without-God dynamics in this world and put me at odds within myself.

The result, Paul says, of these battling desires within me is that “I am not to do whatever I want.” The earlier NIV was “so that you do not do what you want.” I think the idea here is there is a reason that I don’t always do what the Spirit desires and what my conscience would have me do. Knowing what is right is not a guarantee of doing what is right. There really is a conflict.

And I’m also struck in this Galatans passage by the destructive connection between flesh and law here. Law is an outside-in dynamic. Spirit is an inside-out dynamic. Part of me keeps thinking that some external rule or principle will solve the problem of my sometimes wayward heart. As a man “in the Spirit” and “led by the Spirit”, I’m not under law. Law, from the outside, cannot change my heart…and that is what I need. It can show me what’s right, but it can’t empower me to do what’s right.

So, living by the Spirit is a relational reality. Living under the law is something I can attempt completely apart from God. I focus on rules instead of focusing on communion with God through His Holy Spirit. How long, Lord, will it take for me to learn that I only find life in You—in communion with You?





Psalm 28:7-9: A Meditation

5 07 2011

(FYI: I’ve had enough friends and readers ask about something that I decided to make something clear. I am not awake every morning at 5:00am Pacific time uploading these daily posts. I almost always schedule them at least one day in advance, sometimes longer when I know I’ll be away or internet-unavailable. My usual rising time, without an alarm, is about 6:00am. I schedule these posts at 5:00am because some readers are on the East coast where it’s already 8:00am.) 

Psalm 28:7-9 NIV
The Lord is my strength and my shield;
my heart trusts in him, and he helps me.
My heart leaps for joy,
and with my song I praise him.
The Lord is the strength of his people,
a fortress of salvation for his anointed one.
Save your people and bless your inheritance;
be their shepherd and carry them forever.

I’ve felt weak and exposed a lot lately. I need to hear that the Lord is my strength and my shield. He energizes and empowers me. He guards and protects me. When I feel down, He is the One Who lifts me up. I can rely on Him. He really does help me. I am not helpless.

This kind of practical care bouys up my heart. I find joy rise within me until my heart almost skips a beat. I literally feel that happening in me right now. I take a deep breath in the place of experienced security. My soul rises up to express praise for God’s greatness and goodness.

Enable me today to have awareness of and confidence in Your strength and protection today. May I be enabled to overcome the feelings of self-doubt, low confidence, anxiety and fear that continue to rise up in me to discourage and even disable me. Thank You. Amen.








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